Posted by Christopher Johnson | Wednesday, December 14th, 2016 | Uncategorized | 15 Comments

Star Wars is about war:

Rogue One review: this is the first Star Wars movie to acknowledge the whole franchise is about war.

They die horrible deaths in spaceship crashes. They’re cut down by light sabers. They’re obliterated by giant explosions. They die brutally and nastily and quickly. They die, as most of us do, with unfinished business.

In and of itself, these insert shots of the humans in the midst of destruction are no different from the ones you might see in other sci-fi adventures, but Edwards repeats this pattern. He always shows you someone’s body flying backward from an explosion, presumably broken. Two Imperial Stormtroopers shoot the breeze about a work-related matter before they’re gunned down. Main characters die. Villains die. Faceless extras die. And they all die the same way — too soon.

In other news, scholars agree that Gone With The Wind has a American Civil War subtext.

Mark Twain’s Life On The Mississippi concerns life along the Mississippi River in the nineteenth century.

Casablanca is anti-Nazi.  So is The Longest Day.

The Peloponnesian War did not involve China.

Neither did Gone With The Wind, Life On The Mississippi, Casablanca or The Longest Day.

15 Comments to BREAKING

unreconstructed rebel
December 14, 2016

Slow day, Chris?

Dale Matson
December 14, 2016

“The Death Star is nearing completion, and only Jyn Erso (Felicity Jones) can save the day in Rogue One.” Is she the first female Jedi Knight?

Christopher Johnson
December 14, 2016

Something like that, ur. At Vox, maybe.

December 14, 2016

Vox just noticed? Bright kids over there.

Scott W.
December 14, 2016

Reads like hangover-meets-looming-deadline.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
December 14, 2016

The series title – Star WARS – kinda tipped me off about 40 years ago. But maybe I’m just precocious.

December 14, 2016

I’ll have to see the film before I judge, but this sounds like a reasonable proposition. The original Star Wars trilogy was not “about” war. A war just provided the setting for the Hero’s Journey of its protagonist. From what I’ve read the new one is more like a real war movie. That sounds like good news.

December 14, 2016

I can’t wait to see how they manage to get Trump worked into their story line based on the rework rumors. Since it is in a galaxy far, far away a long, long time ago.

I know that I’m not alone, but I am just dumbfounded by the level of overreaction/panic by the anti-Trumpers. I am also dumbfounded by the double standard. I would be shocked except for having seen it in the TEC Wars.

sybil marshall
December 14, 2016


Maybe they’ll put a Riders of Rohan-style blond mane on Darth Vader’s helmet. They’re about that subtle.

December 14, 2016


Gregg the Obscure
December 14, 2016

So counting Ep IV, Ep VII and Rogue, the empire makes three death stars, each of which only serves to kill off enormous numbers of imperial subjects and drain the treasury in the process? Is the empire really just an elaborate metaphor for Margaret Sanger’s Murder, Inc?

December 14, 2016

Top Chef is about chefs I hear.

December 15, 2016

I walked out on the franchise in 1999 when introduced to Jar Jar Binks. Left the theater in the middle of the movie, and haven’t seen one since.

sybil marshall
December 15, 2016

The first one was fun, but the whole weirder and weirder creatures thing got old by the end of the 2nd one. There is no way (for me) to take that seriously, so I think it’s best to not even really try to make them believable. Same problem with New Who (in addition to the ramped-up PC); the production values are too high LOL. Want to see those zippers up the back of the mummy costumes, etc; it’s part of the fun. But I am admittedly a weird creature.

The ad looks like an ad for yet another Hollywood lead-simply-must-be-female thing, too. So tedious.

chris (not our esteemed host)
December 15, 2016

In other news, Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.

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