ATTENTION

Friday, December 20th, 2013 | Uncategorized

As many of you know, I have, for many years, been the strongest advocate for making the Rev. Bonnie “It’s An Aircraft Carrier, Not A Refrigerator Magnet It’s A River, Not A Pie” Perry into an Episcopal bishop.  While I would still like to see that happen, a far stronger candidate for an Episcopal pointy hat and an Episcopal hooked stick has recently appeared on the scene and superseded Ms. Perry.

Danielle Tumminio.

Why?  Two reasons.  For one thing, she’s quite the looker; Danielle gives a WHOLE new definition to the term “bishop’s visitation,” if you know what I mean and I think you do.  Kick Tumminio upstairs and the Episcopalians pretty much lock up the crucial middle-school boy and creepy adult male demographics.

The other reason is that, in the course of “clarifying” her recent defense of polygamy, Tumminio accidentally came up with the single, greatest description of the Episcopal religion that I’ve ever seen anywhere:

However, Ms. Tumminio told Anglican Ink that she was “not advocating for a change in The Episcopal Church’s teaching on marriage to accommodate plural relationships.  If, for instance, I was asked to perform a plural marriage, I would decline, explaining that it is not in line with the Doctrine and Discipline of The Episcopal Church.”

Oh.  Okay.  Might plural marriage also not be…in line…with…anything else…that a supposedly-Christian minister might find…important?  No?

Her support for polygamy was not theological, but based on libertarian principles and a belief in civil religious toleration.

Except that it was.  From Danielle’s CNN piece.

I also believe there are theoretical reasons why, as a Christian, it makes sense to support healthy polygamous practices. It’s a natural extension for those Christians who support same-sex marriage on theological grounds. But even for those opposed to same-sex marriage, polygamy is documented in the Bible, thereby giving its existence warrant.

It does mean, though, that there is room for Christians to support the right of consenting adults to make choices about marriage that align with their religious beliefs in a country that prides itself on religious freedom.

Finally, like us, they want to practice their faith. And as long as that practice is in the service of cultivating loving, healthy relationships that strive to honor God and neighbor, I believe it is possible for even nonpolygamous Christians such as myself to support their calling.

Danielle’s bishop, Ian Douglas, had this to say.

The Rt. Rev. Ian Douglas, Bishop of Connecticut, who exercises ecclesial jurisdiction over Ms. Tumminio, told Anglican Ink: “I am in keeping with the doctrine and discipline of The Episcopal Church, and thus I do not support polygamy.”

Damn.  Does DT have chops or what?  Ian’s going to have a little chat with the lass.

He noted that the article had come to his notice after having been contacted by Anglican Ink for comments, and stated he planned “to be in communication with Ms. Tumminio about what she has written.”

People, we simply have to make this happen.

38 Comments to ATTENTION

dwstroudmd+
December 20, 2013

No doubt the good bishop will issue a very stern, “Harumph! There, there, Dearie, don’t go stirring up the pew potatoes when they rotting so nicely and quietly.”

Allen Lewis
December 20, 2013

Eye-candy, indeed. I would have to find somewhere else to worship. The temptation would be too much.

But definitely, not a theologian!

Gregg the Obscure
December 20, 2013

Yes, polygamy is documented in the Bible. So are fratricide, idolatry, deceit, torture, theft, rape and a host of other sins. Doesn’t mean any of those are endorsed – whether in those circumstances or ours.

I guess that level of insight is to be expected when clergy’s exposure to Scripture, tradition, church history and the like comes from the cariactures written by the followers of Malthus, de Sade and Sanger rather than from principal sources.

Fuinseoig
December 20, 2013

Right. She changed her mind on polygamy due to civil liberties and political grounds, not religious.

We’re probably going to get same-sex civil marriage over here in Ireland soon. I could be persuaded to support this as a matter of justice, giving that straight people are screwming up marriage perfectly fine on their own so why not let Joe and Mick or Sally and Josie have their day in the registry office, but I am not giving “little squeal(s) of delight” about it.

Either the Rev. Tumminio is really into politics, or this is a cause dear to her heart, so I wouldn’t be taking any bets on her sticking to that refusal if Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice roll up to the door of her church and ask her for a blessing ceremony on their committed relationship.

I don’t know about a bishopric, Christopher, but surely a post as Dean of a Theological College is on the cards?

:-)

FW Ken
December 20, 2013

Boy, are y’all bringing back memories. A bunch of boys in a Baptist Sunday School class brought up the fact that the patriarchs had multiple wives. Our teacher quickly pointed out that every instance, from Abraham and Hagar to Solomon and his harem, ended badly. It doesn’t take a seminary degree to read the words on the page.

Katherine
December 20, 2013

I’m surprised +Douglas is going to chat with her about this, but I won’t hold my breath for any serious discipline. As to the bishopric, she’s far more attractively feminine in appearance than several of the current TEC female bishops, so is that a recommendation or a negative?

I read today that a Canadian court outlawed all prostitution laws. Like plural marriage, this is a logical outcome of the libertarian view that people should be allowed to do what they want to with their bodies and their lives. I wouldn’t be so upset if only the latest group to be decriminalized wouldn’t immediately begin demanding approval and public benefits.

LaVallette
December 20, 2013

“Her support for polygamy was not theological, but based on libertarian principles and a belief in civil religious toleration.” but “she was “not advocating for a change in The Episcopal Church’s teaching on marriage to accommodate plural relationships.

So this woman is intellectually dishonest! Intellectual dishonesty is a fraud!

sybil marshall
December 20, 2013

Christopher, you are right, we must make this happen. If enough of us make enough jokes about it, Johnson’s Law will kick in big time and she will be the next or the next-to-the-next PBess, too.

Katherine (and anyone else who has interest), no luck today– the scope would not pass, even when tried again by a specialist up from Fort Wayne. Obviously adds to our uneasiness about what is going on in the gut, and we don’t know what is next now…I ended up in the dermatologist’s office late yesterday (which beats ending up in the ER again) who re-started the Prednisone etc. May be starting to see some effect tonight, not sure. This Pred is spread out thinner, so to speak, and longer, so maybe I won’t have to go join the ISP Detective division as “Dirty” Harry’s junior partner and kick-down-the-doors goon, LOL. That’s good, as even when you are in good shape for 62, your Emma Peel leather catsuit days are behind you. But I so would have loved to finally get my ride in the cruiser at chase speed with the lights and siren on… ah the creature is nervous enough to be chattery, sorry.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
December 20, 2013

I found one of the sillier aspects of this mess of daft taffy to be this little girls assertion that she had “met” the Brown’s At first I took her at her word only to realize that there was no proper introduction. No inquiries. No discussion. This child believes she “met” this family because she watched them on the television. She sat in front of the “boob tube” watching a “reality” show.

Oh Lord save the souls that she stains!

FW Ken
December 20, 2013

Katherine,

Legalized prostitution decriminalizes a private act. I won’t say “consensual” because it generally is not. But at least it doesn’t demand public recognition for sexual dysfunction.

JM
December 20, 2013

Although not strong, the Scriptural case for polygamy is several orders of magnitude stronger than the case for same sex marriage. Just a matter of time.

ccinnova
December 21, 2013

If we’re going by looks as well as aberrant views on sexuality, then I wonder who gets her pointy hat first: Danielle “healthy polygamous practices” Tumminio or Ginger “don’t do the pew” Strickland?

Maxine
December 21, 2013

According to Sen. Tom Coburn, regulation written into the tax code, expense for breast-implant surgery can be written off as a business expense for owners of brothels. (Doing business where prostitution is legal)

Fr. Fred Ayers
December 21, 2013

Based on their ages, there is time for Bonnie Perry to become a bishop and for Danielle Tumminio to be her successor. Of course, since Perry is a lesbian (what a waste!), she will appeal more to a diocese that is looking to prove that that Mary Glasspool isn’t an aberration. Tumminio, on the other hand, could be elected in just about any diocese. And isn’t that a fine commentary on the state of the Episcopal Church today?

Allen Lewis
December 21, 2013

I must be getting old. When did perversion become the new normal?

William Tighe
December 21, 2013

“Tumminio” sounds like a popish name (her married name is Hansen), but just as I was about chalk up another case of us giving our dreck to TE”C” in return for their best, I saw that her (rather biographically meager) Wikipedia article states that she was raised an Episcopalian.

Dale Matson
December 21, 2013

“…healthy polygamous practices” TEC the organization that specializes in ‘coupling’ things that should not go together.

Scott W.
December 21, 2013

Her support for polygamy was not theological, but based on libertarian principles and a belief in civil religious toleration.

Reminds me of a libertarian who said in all seriousness, “MY Holy book is the U.S. Constitution!”

I wonder if we will start seeing this picture as a mural in Episcopal churches: http://jonmcnaughton.com/content/ZoomDetailPages/OneNationUnderGod.html

Ed the Roman
December 21, 2013

Professor, she’d certainly be more attractive than any of our bishops.

Katherine
December 21, 2013

Sybil, thanks for the update. Boo on no results. Still praying. I know women who’ve had ‘roid rage on prednisone. You’re not alone, if that helps. Maybe if there’s a liberal politician in the way this could be managed constructively?

sybil marshall
December 21, 2013

Katherine,
LOL! You get to pick who. Seriously, I don’t seem to get rage with Prednisone, seem to just get extra hyper, plus some weepiness last time. But I do avoid confrontations even more than normal as a precaution, and it’s fun to joke about raging and going and LOOMING in all my amazon glory LOL over Creepen or some other highly deserving smarmy, nasty leftoid. Locally, there are almost no libs who will admit to it, but plenty 8( of GOP squishes, as we are a mixed county (part farm/small business, part lakes). So there’s a possibility (joke).

Allen Lewis
December 21, 2013

Sybil -
Sorry to hear no results. I join Katherine in praying for you and your family. Lots of luck with the Prednisone. Anytime I have had to take it has not been fun,.

Steve
December 21, 2013

Dear Sybil,

Sorry to read about your problem. I will pray for your full recovery.

Come to Boston, it’s only two hours away from Indiana. Don’t mess around out there when you have the greatest medical talent in the world within a 20 mile radius here.

Praying that you have a Happy Christmas and a Healthy New Year

sybil marshall
December 21, 2013

Thanks to all for the concern/prayers! Being beset at Christmas is not a problem, not in the sense of spoiling anything, anyway, since I already despise (secular/family) Christmas etc anyway due to my childhood. But for any among us who do get to enjoy that family part of it, and I pray that means most, I always hope you do so wonderfully. (And for others like me, you are not alone, and He will get us through it again!) Anyway, thanks for the concern/prayers. You are all a very present help and I thank my God always for thee(s).

FW Ken
December 21, 2013

God bless you, Sybil. You are in my prayers.

And yes, Prednisone is miserable. My last course of it, I slept less than 10 hours in 5 night. Two nights were sleepless.

Katherine
December 21, 2013

This just goes to show that sometimes you never know what you should be grateful for. I’ve taken prednisone a few times for allergic reactions to bee stings, and I’ve never had any of these problems with it. On the other hand, I suffer unpleasant side effects from sudafed and some antihistamines. Just get better, Sybil, and we’ll keep you in prayer.

Paula Loughlin
December 21, 2013

Sybil, I hope you have the answers you seek very soon and that you are restored to full health ASAP.

bob
December 21, 2013

This is just another desperate measure to get butts in the pews. What they forgot around 40 years ago is, once you tell everyone everything is OK they don’t need to hear it twice. They aren’t *around* to hear a zero like this tell it to an echoing, empty building Sunday morning. They just do what they want, same sex, opposite sex, multiple of the above, whatever. It means so much more to not be an Anglican than it does to be one. It’s not like it’s a church or something.

Clown Celebrant
December 21, 2013

Yes she is cute in a Danica Patrick sort of way, but nothing like horse faced Katherine Bejeebers Schlamorie, who is a much more ravishingly attractive bishop, if you’re a guy who likes girls who look like guys who also look equine.

gppp
December 22, 2013

My favorite Prednisone moments:

1. I had been down with mono — in horrible pain and unable to take in more than diluted Sprite — for five days, but an hour after my first dose was sitting at the kitchen table eating two chicken pot pies. I also ate like a horse for the next two weeks.

2. Not long after that, while singing in the choir at Washington Cathedral, popped a couple Prednisone before big gig and sang like a lark after being almost incapacitated by wicked bronchitis for almost a month.

I know it can be really rough on some but it can be a godsend, too.

Sybil, know that whatever it might do to you it’s only temporary, and that you should keep in touch with doctor, who should be just as concerned as you are about what it does to you. Don’t be afraid to call if anything comes up.

Prayers ascending.

J.M. Heinrichs
December 22, 2013

Katherine
Nope; technically, prostitution is not illegal in Canada, which is not to be interpreted as ‘being legal’. Please don’t ask for an explanation.
There were three laws adjudicated: establishing a brothel, living on the proceeds of prostitution, and soliciting on the streets. The SCC decided that the laws were not constitutional as written, and has given Parliament a year to rewrite them for reconsideration by the Court.

Cheers

Katherine
December 22, 2013

Thanks, J.M. Heinrichs. This gives me hope that the frozen (soon to be more frozen, with the cooling going on) northland is not altogether crazy. You’ve repealed some of the worst of the freedom of speech restrictions, as I understand it. Good work. Now Mark Steyn is being sued in the US; he just can’t stay out of it, although he’s right about this one, too.

The Little Myrmidon
December 22, 2013

Apparently this person is canonically resident in CT, not MA? She reports to the Bp. of CT, Ian Douglas, not Bp. Shaw. No matter, I suppose. Douglas is just as likely as Shaw would be to consider this a minor matter.

I’ve read that she’s a priest associate at Christ Church, Quincy (MA) but their webpage says nothing about her. The Diocese of MA webpage has no info on her, unless you do a search for her name and then the only results are her lecture series on Hogwarts, that was sponsored by Church of the Advent in Boston (Beacon Hill.)

So, she seems to be a rather free-floating individual.

Dave
December 23, 2013

Myrmidon -

“Lecture series on Hogwarts” eh?

To be sure, “Free floating” is an apt description of both the individual and her “theologamadingy”.

tjmcmahon
December 23, 2013

Douglas fancies himself a supporter of bisexuality (the B of LGBT) which requires support for either polygamy or sex outside of marriage, so if he does not support polygamy, he MUST therefore be advocating for sex outside of marriage.

Colin Pye
December 24, 2013

Methinks that Mrs. Tumminio’s ardent defence of polygamy will disappear once Mr. Tumminio takes her at her word and brings home a second wife.

Michal
December 24, 2013

As for Ms. Tumminio’s creds: just consider that she has held forth on Harry Potter…and doesn’t think it’s wrong. She need to know that magic is not done by mortals!

Michal
December 24, 2013

Drat…that should have been ‘needs’

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