I cannot say that it made it funny, but it did make reading her tolerable. I am very unsure if that is a good thing. Normally, when I read something from her (or a number of other “theologians”), I stop in disgust after a short while. I actually made it through this time.

That’s beautiful. I have tears in my eyes…

Perhaps Yakety Sax could become as emblematic a musical accompaniment to the Presiding Bishop as “Hail to the Chief” is for the President, or “Tu Es Petrus” is for the Pope.

Chris,
Just a thought–you might try brief dramatic pauses in the reading to let the sax do the talking after a particularly trenchant turn of phrase. A good tune up for GC2009.

I probably would have never have read the essay without having first heard the accompaniment.

Now I’d like to see you read KJS over “Baby Elephant Walk” and test the listeners’ comprehension of the material read.

Oh, I forgot – it’s incomprehensible either way. Okay, how about you test which tune is whistled absently by the listener during tedious tasks up to 72 hours later, or during any ECUSA “worship” service, whichever happens first?

The last half is a bit rambling and incoherent, no?

head coverings … John the Baptist beheaded … interesting gay gynecologists in wheel chairs … male supremacy.

She also creates a vacuum she doesn’t fill: “All of which is to suggest that all of us read Scripture through the lenses we have”. Ok, all interpretations of the text are valid, therefore the text is worthless, except as personal literature. So how do YOU arrive at your notions of what is normative, KJS?

That was hilarious. Chris, your comedic genius is forever cemented in my mind and heart.

-Jim+

You are certifiable.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/certifiable

“…attitudes there and in other parts of the world toward male homosexuality…the perception that one of the partners in such a union must be acting like a woman…New Testament references have more to do with abusive and exploitative behavior.”

Whre’s she going with this? As a matter of fact where’s she going with this whole diatribe? Does she know how to write? I had a hard time drawing any conclusions about this. Is it just me?

Regardless of what Ms. Schori thinks, there still is a definite “husband” and “wife” in heterosexual marriage usually with pretty well defined rôles to play. I don’t refer to my husband as my “wife” and we’re NOT equal (at least not in the sense of “interchangeable” as is implied in Ms. Schore’s comments.)

I also would argue that, yes, there are definite male/female rôles in same-sex relationships. I have heard this through health-care professionals. At least in gay mens’ relationships, there is “gender-rôle-identification” that does not change even if the partners change. One is either the aggressive or the passive partner. So in one sense, there is always an element of conquest/submission that can be exploitative.

The documentation I’ve seen on age-disparity that is frequent in gay mens’ relationships argues strongly for exploitation.

If I’m wrong about that, please refer me to some data on the subject.

Brilliant, Chris, as usual. I would suggest a slight adjustment in volume. The delightfully corny music was a little loud, drowning out your dulcet tones. Nice voice, empty words.

Sorry, but I just can’t bear to listen. Combining Yakety Sax with Katherine Schori dishonors the memories of both Boots Randolph and Benny Hill. A good and proper application of Yakety Sax can be seen in the movie V for Vendetta. As they continue to accumulate attorneys like showers accumulate mildew, maybe they’ll name David Booth Beers as High Chancellor of TEC.

I could not get the embedded audio to work. I had to view the source and go directly to the audio link. Unfortunately, my hearing is so poor, I could barely hear the background music over the spoken word.

However, having read Ms Schori’s condescending screed elsewhere, I am of the opinion that there is little or nothing that would make it pleasant to hear. But then again, maybe I just don’t appreciate good comedy.

Sitting here giggling…

One morning at worship at the primates’ meeting, we heard the reading from Corinthians that says women should be quiet in church and ask their husbands at home if they have questions (1Cor 14:33b-35).

The most shocking thing in this latest bovine emission is the news that the Primates had the temerity to read from the forbidden texts. Don’t they know that such things are no longer tolerated? They are not to be heard let alone taken seriously.

It was followed by the Gospel passage that recounts Salome and Herodias’ request for the head of John the Baptist. I don’t believe that section of the Gospel, alone, is ever read at Eucharist in the Episcopal Church — because there is precious little good news in it.

Well of course the cow is right about this not being read at the Eucharist here. What she doesn’t mention is that it is directed to be read in Church in the Daily Office. Plus, this wasn’t a Eucharist, as many of those Primates would be damned if they would commune with her godforsakenness.

It certainly made the experience much more tolerable, as had I listened to the unaccompanied words, I would have been offended and/or outraged.

The music, however, was so distracting that I found myself paying more attention to it, and though the silliness of the extract remained the same, the plesantness of the occasion was greatly enhanced.

Definitely this theory has merit!

I can’t say that “Yakety Sax” made it any easier to hear KJS’s words. It did, however, provide a way of letting one’s attention slip away from the verbal assault (meaning her words, not your voice, CJ) and focus on something much more enjoyable.

In fact, I almost got a feeling of hearing “La la la, I can’t hear you” thanks to the musical accompinament.

The best laugh I’ve had all day.

“The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down” would be another appropriate musical accompaniment.

“Where’s she going with this? As a matter of fact where’s she going with this whole diatribe? Does she know how to write? I had a hard time drawing any conclusions about this. Is it just me?”

Little Myrmidon, no, it’s not just you. This is the most vapid piece of prose I’ve come across in quite some time.

However, I enjoyed Yakety Sax and CJ’s creative (if weird) juxtaposition.

Chris –
For some quirky reason, my FireFox browser refuses to use the WMP application (even though I tell it to). The Quicktime™ does work fine. Thanks for you efforts. Interestingly enough, that one I could hear fine.

On topic now.

Little Myrm asks where Madame Schori was going with the riff on other cultures views of male homosexuality and then her odd invocation of New Testament references. What I got from it is that she is trying to make this a Culturally Relative issue.

That is, other cultures, and I think that her implication is primitive, unsophisticated cultures, i.e. anywhere other than the Enlightened West, tend to object to male homosexuality on the basis that one partner must play the role of a *GASP* woman!. Seems to me she is trying to cast the aspersion of being Patriarchal – the Ultimate Sin in the Feminist handbook – as well as being primitive at those cultures who object to homosexual behavior. This would tend to neuter those culture’s objections to homosexual practice.

The New Testament reference was an attempt to contrast what the homosexualists like to claim is the NT concern about homosexual practice – exploitation – with the OT emphasis on a male acting in a woman’s role.

She is attempting to produce a classic Red Herring in order to confuse the issue. In my, perhaps benighted view, both the OT and NT object to homosexual practice on the basis of created order, not confusion of gender roles.

My basic take on this particular emission by the PB is that she is trying to portray the other Provinces of the AC as ignorant, backward and primitive. LO! The White Man’s Burden of having to educate the savages!

The more I read of her attempts to justify TECusa’s behavior the more odious she becomes. She is a poisonous personality and the sooner people dissociate themselves from her and her organization the better off they will be.

Oh, yeah. I liked the Yakkity Sax accompaniment too. I think a similar effect could be achieved using a loop of the Peanuts Teacher’s Voice.

Wonk wonk wonk woonk! (repeat ad infinitum)

Oh, that’s a good one!

I think you should try to get Schorleone’s own voice. Yours is too reasonable-sounding. And a vidoe of the oven mitt would be perfect.

“One morning at worship at the primates’ meeting, we heard the reading from Corinthians that says women should be quiet in church and ask their husbands at home if they have questions (1Cor 14:33b-35).” St.Paul bad; victim of his own period in history: Definitely NOT Episcopalian

“There is no longer Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no longer male and female; for all of you are one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3:28″ St.Paul good; inclusive but still aware of and celebrating diversity: preacher of Episcopalian fundamentals.

All the poor man needs is strict editing and correct interpretation.

I’m afraid I found the music distracting. I had to read the essay itself to realize how completely nonsensical and pointless it truly was.

Dear Chris,

What an amusing idea! The music was a little loud compared to the voice. Well, only if we were supposed to get the “content.”
Wait a minute, maybe the music should be louder.
Anyway it is easier to make it through her emissions with the accompaniment and your nice voice.

M