KEEP THE RECEIPTS

Thursday, February 24th, 2011 | Uncategorized

Nanner McBotoxEgo must be really tough to shop for:

The Democratic National Committee wanted to honor Nancy Pelosi Thursday — but its praise wasn’t good enough for the House minority leader.

I’ll bet when young Nanner and her fiancé were shopping for an engagement ring, Nanner was all like, “Not that one, stupid!  The big one in the back!  Yeah, I know how much it costs!!  Figure out a way to afford it, dumbass!!”

When the DNC’s Resolutions Committee brought up a resolution commemorating Pelosi’s years as speaker of the House, Pelosi’s daughter sought to alter the proposal at her mother’s behest, adding some of the accomplishments that the elder Pelosi felt the committee had overlooked.

And God help Mr. Nanner if he ever comes home from the market with Jim Beam.

“I have some friendly amendments,” said Christine Pelosi, a political strategist, at the committee’s session during the DNC Winter Meeting at the Marriott Wardman Park hotel Thursday afternoon. She is a member of the committee.

Around Christmas, Nanner probably tells her family, “Just give me lots of money.  I’m sick of the crap you people always buy me.”

“You think I’m kidding,” Christine Pelosi added, to surprised laughter from the room. The proposed changes, she indicated, came out of a discussion with her mother.

When Nanner wins her Nobel Peace Prize, she’s going to open her Oslo acceptance speech with, “Let’s get one thing straight.  That medal’s going to have to be twice as big and you’re going to have to come up with four times the scratch.  Oh, and you stupid Vikings are going to have to pick up my first-class jet fare home.”

9 Comments to KEEP THE RECEIPTS

Smurf Breath
February 24, 2011

I hope they’ve included as one of her accomplishments in her years as speaker (all 2 of them), the discovery of the concept of retroactive legislative comprehension: “We have to pass the bill first in order to find out what’s in it.”

Daniel Muller
February 24, 2011

“We have to pass the resolution first in order to find out what’s in it.”

FIFY, Nanner. Discussing amendments is superfluous.

Confessor
February 24, 2011

Wonder if her conversations with God are a list of demands.

Amy P.
February 24, 2011

I cannot stand her. Every time she sends out something on Twitter, I compulsively respond with the snarkiest comment I can manage.

No, it’s not charitable. But she rubs me the wrong way so I will not pass up an opportunity to point out what a day-glo orange hypocrite she is.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
February 24, 2011

I think she makes Leona Helmsley look like a pussy cat. I see she’s raising her daughter in her image.

Don Janousek
February 24, 2011

They left out creation of the moon and the stars, curing cancer, ending poverty world-wide, inventing a perpetual motion machine, bringing Atlantis up from the ocean floor and rewriting the Bible in Klingon. Such a wonderful, wonderful woman.

Confessor: Not only are her prayers demands, but they are non-negotiable and God first has to answer them to see what’s in them.

Mike
February 24, 2011

She always reminds me of Bonnie Anderson.

Brize
February 24, 2011

Confessor: I’m prepared to believe that they may be a monologue delivered in front of a mirror.

Allen Lewis
February 25, 2011

And people ask how this country got into the mess it is in? Here is part of the answer.

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