I’M GOING TO HAVE TO ASK YOU TO STOP

Tuesday, December 21st, 2010 | Uncategorized

Or, NERDS!!  NERDS!!  NERDS!!

Across the country this week, productions of Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” are warming hearts. In [Chicago], one version poses this question: What if Charles Dickens were a Trekkie?

The answer runs an hour and 20 minutes and includes three fight scenes, 17 actors with latex ridges glued to their foreheads and a performance delivered entirely in Klingon—a language made up for a Star Trek movie.

For those not fluent in Klingon, English translations are projected above the stage.

The arc of “A Klingon Christmas Carol” follows the familiar Dickens script: An old miser is visited on a hallowed night by three ghosts who shepherd him through a voyage of self-discovery. The narrative has been rejiggered to match the Klingon world view.

For starters, since there is neither a messiah nor a celebration of his birth on the Klingon planet of Kronos, the action is pegged to the Klingon Feast of the Long Night. Carols and trees are replaced with drinking, fighting and mating rituals. And because Klingons are more concerned with bravery than kindness, the main character’s quest is for courage

12 Comments to I’M GOING TO HAVE TO ASK YOU TO STOP

Bill (not IB)
December 21, 2010

Spare me. This kind of “what-if?” scenario is both meaningless and, IMHO, degrading and discriminatory. I’m as ardent a fan of Star Trek as the next guy (I have a photo from many years ago of myself shaking hands with Gene Rodenberry!) but this isn’t “Trekky-ism”, it’s just pure nonsense. You may as well speculate about a meeting between H.G. Wells and Daedalus.

Maureen
December 21, 2010

1. First of all, these Klingon-language productions have been going on for quite a while, and they’re meant to be FOR FUN. Comedy. A linguistic joke. They’ve done several Klingon-language Shakespeare productions, IIRC.

2. Of course you can speculate on a meeting between H.G. Wells and Daedalus. Don’t read a lot of alternate-history science fiction, I can see that.

3. I’m not much into alt-history or historical crossovers myself; but if other people want to write it, that’s their privilege.

Don Janousek
December 21, 2010

I think this is great fun.

“Worf was dead.” “Bah, Cyrilean-planet-ectro-bug!” “Everyone who goes about wishing a Merry Christmas should be buried with a Kling multi-blade battle sword through his heart!”

Actually, I hope someday to see a completely mime “A Christmas Carol.”

Government Drone
December 21, 2010

I saw it a couple weeks back; it was actually quite entertaining, though I’m still normal enough to have needed the supertitles to figure out what was going on. Before the show one of the troupe members mentioned that they had to have 4 new Klingon words minted to completely render all the lines. I don’t know what they were, but I suspect the translation of “Bah! Humbug!” (BaQa’) was one of them.

Government Drone
December 21, 2010

Oh, & I forgot:

http://www.klingonxmas.org/

The Little Myrmidon
December 21, 2010

So, what next? Khan as Fagin in a remake of Oliver!

[...] Hattip to Midwest Conservative Journal.  I enjoy Christmas traditions.  The Christmas Tree, singing Carols, wretched Illinois weather, hot coco, presents, watching several versions of A Christmas Carol, etc.  Perhaps the wildest version of a Christmas Carol is a Klingon adaptation of the timeless tale, presented, of course, in Klingonese.  The Wall Street Journal gives us the details: [...]

Ed the Roman
December 22, 2010

Next up: the LOLcat King Lear!

Anonymous Anglican
December 22, 2010

Knew a deacon once who wanted to read the Psalms with a Klingon flair. “Lord, SMITE my enemies!!” ;-)

Anonymous Anglican
December 22, 2010

And that was supposed to be “end sentence, return, smiley face.”

midwestnorwegian
December 22, 2010

“Are there no dilithium crystal mines? No Gamesters of Triskelion shock collars??” Bah! Horta Monster!

Sorry…I know I can be obtuse.

Fuinseoig
December 22, 2010

I now shamefacedly admit that my first reaction was “But has this not been done already, in the ‘Next Generation’ episode where the clone of Kahless the Unforgettable encouraged the Klingon people to re-discover their true honour?”

I’ll get me coat…

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